Me

As a dam at the back of the throat

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For two years, I have fallen into anorexia. It is said that this disease affects mostly adolescents ... At twenty-three, with a life that started pretty well, a marriage that arrived on schedule and a baby in the stomach, I had everything to be happy. Unfortunately, the man I loved decided to leave me and my life rocked. I fell into despair. All my sweet dreams flew away in five minutes. No more marriage, no more dad to raise this beautiful baby and more the man I loved most in the world by my side. How to live like this? Impossible. I did not want anything anymore.

The diet started to disgust me and make me want to throw up. I took the cigarette again, and when Mélina was born, I touched the alcohol. Two years after giving birth, I lost my twenty pounds of pregnancy but also ten more pounds. For eighteen months, I have lost weight. Everyone criticizes me, judges me, and thinks that I do not want to eat so as not to get fat. But nobody can understand that for me, feeding is impossible. I have a dam at the back of my throat. Eating is a sign of well-being for me, so I can not. Nobody understands how much I can suffer from this breakup. Being a single mother is too hard to bear.

I thought so many times to commit suicide ... But when I looked at my daughter, I did not feel able to. Today, I would like so much to get out of it. To be proud of my daughter and me, but I no longer have the strength to fight. It is said that a child is the most beautiful thing in life, but to live without one's father is not a life! I have the strength to raise my daughter as best as possible, to love her as much as possible, and to do everything in my power to make her happy.

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